[INSERT GROAN AND/OR EYEROLL HERE]
After we were done with our baking adventure last weekend, Renee and I decided to spend the rest of the time before the party going through the indie game demos on XBOX Live and well, this popped up. Seriously? Come on...
See, I have an advanced degree in Gender Studies, which means I am a pro at identifying misogyny, getting pissed about it and then deconstructing why it exists in the intersecting structures of oppression. Renee has a degree in Anthropology which means she is a pro at identifying cultural signifiers, laughing at their mere existence and placing them into context within the larger cultural structure. In other words, if the two of us are sitting on my couch, with controllers in hand and some time to kill, sh*t like this is really hard to pass up.
Unfortunately, the game totally did not live up to the hype (and by hype, I mean our hope that it would be truly god awful and offensive).
Yes, its mere existence is an example of the lack of value placed on women as living breathing human beings with...oh, I don't know...feelings and intelligence, as well as, the continued belief that all gamers are dudes with a 14 year-old mindset and beings with...oh, I don't know...feelings and intelligence, but it is also extremely B-O-R-I-N-G.
The gameplay consists of stock footage headshots that flash over some sort of undefinable map while you get texts asking to go on "dates" (9am on a Tuesday? Awesome date time!). You then have to decide if you can fit the date into your schedule; where to go on your date from a list of exciting locales such as your living room, the mall and the gym; decide what intellectually stimulating things you will discuss such as drinking, shopping and exercise; and how long you will do each thrilling activity for. You get points by keeping the headshots entertained by arbitrarily picking their favorite boring topic to discuss and then making sure you don't double book your "dates."
So, rather than getting your yahoos through indie game sexy-time, you instead get to practice your scheduling skills as a personal assistant to some douchey boss who likes to give women his work number, needs you to keep track of all the pesky details about his "associates" like their names, and can take a two hour "lunch" at 9am on Tuesday. Fun times!